wow, this is something I’ve never considered much, but reading your comments, i know exactly where you are coming from. people can lose jobs for being gay, (i know i have), that is an awful fear to have to live with.
i’m just a different kind of person, I’ve always been about Paul,
my life and i will do what i want,
screw those that don’t like it.
yes, it has cost me a lot of things,
but hey, i love myself so much, i don’t care.
as arch knows, i’m one of those in your face about everything if i’m confronted.
but no reason anyone else need be.
i’m just happy for you all knowing that you have escaped the xtian mindset.
i dont’ hate xtians, a few love me very much and i wouldn’t be alive if not for them,
but the rest….uggghhhhhh! they gotta get a grip on reality and stay the hell outta my way.
i’m just a different kind of person, I’ve always been about Paul,
my life and i will do what i want,
screw those that don’t like it.
yes, it has cost me a lot of things,
but hey, i love myself so much, i don’t care.
It’s always interesting to hear this. This is such a foreign concept to me. I used to always put everyone else ahead of myself. Not wanting to esteem myself more highly than I ought I esteemed myself not at all. I’ve learned that’s no good and am trying to figure out how to live in the middle somewhere.
oooppppss, strange, my comment posted before I even finished my point.
Ruth, my self esteem was in the gutter when I was a child,
I suffered a lot of mental and physical abuse at the hands of my xtian parents because I was such an unrepentant sissy. lol.
again, my opinion, but I think people need to love themselves and make themselves happy before even bothering to put anyone else first. it just isn’t going to work otherwise.
you will get to that place, the middle ground you seek, just remember, never make yourself feel less in order to make anyone else feel more.
When I was raising my son, I did not promote atheism, neither did I ever send him to church – the topic of religion simply never came up. My son ultimately married a staunch Catholic girl, with the deeply-held convictions rarely seen outside the Hispanic culture to which she belonged. He has gone from agnostic, when they were married (if the term can be applied to one who simply never thinks about religion, one way or another), to a full-blown atheist today. Sticking with his Dad through three marriages, he early on decided that divorced was not something he ever wanted to be, and so he has never mentioned his beliefs – or lack of them – to his wife, or, for that matter, his son. He goes to church every week, participates in church activities, does the kneeling and the crossing and the wafer and the wine – the whole nine yards – in essence, he is living a double life, sans cape and tights.
A few weeks ago, when he was driving his son home from basketball practice, the boy asked, “Remember how you told me that when I grew up I could choose which religion I wanted to be? I think I want to be an atheist.”
I swear on a stack of Origin of Species that I had nothing to do with it! I just hope his Mom’s heart is strong enough to take the surprise she’s going to be in for in a few years! And that I can handle the blame that will ultimately be heaped on me, despite my innocence.
the all caps was an accident. I’m wasn’t yelling, just not paying enough attention to what i’m doing this morning. my brain is all over the place today.
my parents would spank me violently with a belt if I even questioned anything in the bible.
eventually I started hitting back, that put a stop to it pretty darn quick.
Careful, Paul – you’re starting to show a softer side of yourself, and if that happens, there’s no going back – “in-your-face” is not likely to work on this blog, ever again.
“I used to always put everyone else ahead of myself. Not wanting to esteem myself more highly than I ought, I esteemed myself not at all. I’ve learned that’s no good and am trying to figure out how to live in the middle somewhere.”
“just remember, never make yourself feel less in order to make anyone else feel more.”
Not arguing that for a second, it’s very sound advice, but sometimes it doesn’t hurt to make yourself SEEM less, in order to make someone else feel more.
“eventually I started hitting back, that put a stop to it pretty darn quick.”
Our approaches are certainly different, I’ll say that – the last time that ever happened to me, I folded my arms and said, “When you’re finished, let me know.” It soon ended, and never happened again.
Yeah, you do have a certain charm, but it’s not easy to spot until you’ve dropped the façade. When the women start going, “Gahhhhh! I’m so sorry, Paul,” you’ve probably hit a good balance.
I come from a very terrible cult environment. I spend my time attempting to reveal the truth to people who might be saved from entering said cult(s) by proving (using science) that the cult is absolutely wrong (in every way). It split into over 700 sects (all teaching about the same thing), some of the leaders are actually in prison for felonies, but people still hang on every rubbish word they say and give them money; liars, felons and wouldn’t you know, some of them have been so abused they have committed suicide. In fact, one of the sect of the cult is regularly exposed on Dr. Phil, but people never wake up.
Can you imagine a church preacher telling you to leave your disabled child in a shopping mall because someone will find it and take care of it? You don’t have to. It’s already been done in the cult. You think that pedophiles are terrible among a certain religion’s priests? Look no further than this little collection of cults with stalkers, pedophiles, narcissists, sociopaths, psychopaths, cons and nutjobs. The DSM-5 isn’t comprehensive enough to cover it all. And don’t forget the coverups.
While I still believe in God, it’s really tough to believe the Bible, since the New Testament seems to have been written by the Roman Catholic Church from crazy traditions spread by word of mouth by the illiterate superstitious and many of the books seem to have been forged. It’s hardly comforting to look to for inspiration.
So I’ve divorced myself from the group (since they don’t seem to have the guts to disfellowship or ban me outright) to preserve some little shred of sanity, instead of sitting there listening to provable outright outrageous lies. But the thing is, what do you do with a spouse who is sliding into dementia, hanging on every word of her “pastor” who committed adultery on his wife as she was dying of cancer?
If you want to understand discrimination — real discrimination — try growing up as a baptized Lutheran attending a Roman Catholic Parochial School from the age of 5 and continuing for 11 years: Watching the RCCs bowing down before graven images. I won’t call it idolatry. It simply physically defies the Second Commandment (which the Catholics excised from their version of Exodus and Deuteronomy).
Truth.
It is an outdated irrelevant concept.
At least in this alternative universe.
Fortunately, my cat is sane (as being the only sane person I know at the moment). It helps keep me centered. And he has his own website (three blogs — because he can!) over at blackopsmikey.com although he’s not doing much right now beyond sleeping. Purr and fur can be so comforting if you’re not allergic (I’m certain to receive persecution because I happen to have a cat too). By the way: He doesn’t like string — he plays with a rope: He’s one big kitty.
“sounds pandering and dishonest to me, but, hey, whateva, I guess.”
Clearly, your parents didn’t go out of their way to enhance your self esteem – the little boy in you was so brow-beaten he was broken, hence the strong girl emerged to protect him. You, of all people, should be aware of the value of protecting another’s self-esteem. Have you never allowed a child to beat you at a game you know you could easily have won? You may not be a “kid person” at all, but if you are, I’ll bet you have.
“But the thing is, what do you do with a spouse who is sliding into dementia, hanging on every word of her ‘pastor’ who committed adultery on his wife as she was dying of cancer?”
I’ve no doubt that NeuroNotes would have something to say on that topic, but she’s busy today with other things.
“my cat is sane…although he’s not doing much right now beyond sleeping.”
Try flipping on the vacuum cleaner – I have it on the good authority of John Zande that that will wake him up. Just make sure that, unlike John, you aren’t holding him at the time —
I picked this up off of Mak’s site, Random Thoughts, and felt it worth sharing:
Chronicles of YHWH 28: A Metastable Figment
by Joseph Wahome
Angel Gabriel once found YHWH pacing up and down in his library, deep in thoughts. YHWH seemed deeply distracted and anxious.
Gabriel: Lord, is everything alright? You look a bit pale.
YHWH: I’ve just finished reading “The God Delusion” by Richard Dawkins, Gabriel.
Gabriel: And?
YHWH: I feel terrible now. That book raises some pretty disturbing points. I’m now half convinced that I don’t exist in reality.
Gabriel: But I’m talking to you, right now.
YHWH: What if both of us are figment’s of someone else’s imagination? What if we both only exist in the minds of religious people?
Gabriel: That can’t be. You sent your son to the humans sometime ago, and he appeared to them physically.
YHWH: Sometimes I wonder whether that actually happened. What if that too is a false memory by some of the religious people? After all, my so called “son” left no verifiable proof of his existence down there.
Gabriel: There are billions of Christians down there now. They are enough proof that your son really walked on earth.
YHWH: Dawkins states that the human mind is susceptible to memes – ideas that become viral and spread within a population very fast, if left unchecked. Memes can be based on reality, or on fiction. What if we are a fictitious meme – of a particularly contagious nature?
Slight pause.
Gabriel: Surely, there must be a tangible way of verifying our existence, Lord.
YHWH: I can’t think of any. We are invisible, intangible, and our very nature keeps changing, depending on who is describing us. Some Christians describe us as loving and forgiving, while others describe us as militant and vengeful. Gabriel, what are we, really?
Gabriel: Whoa. Let’s try and live apart from the perceptions and thoughts of these human beings. Let’s try and manifest independently of the human mind.
YHWH: I’ve tried that already, Gabriel. And failed. Apparently, we can’t exist outside human minds. This is terrifying.
Finding Truth 
wow, this is something I’ve never considered much, but reading your comments, i know exactly where you are coming from. people can lose jobs for being gay, (i know i have), that is an awful fear to have to live with.
i’m just a different kind of person, I’ve always been about Paul,
my life and i will do what i want,
screw those that don’t like it.
yes, it has cost me a lot of things,
but hey, i love myself so much, i don’t care.
as arch knows, i’m one of those in your face about everything if i’m confronted.
but no reason anyone else need be.
i’m just happy for you all knowing that you have escaped the xtian mindset.
i dont’ hate xtians, a few love me very much and i wouldn’t be alive if not for them,
but the rest….uggghhhhhh! they gotta get a grip on reality and stay the hell outta my way.
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“My pastors would not let me explain to the congregation why I no longer believed”
That’s understandable – wouldn’t want to start ’em thinking —
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i’m just a different kind of person, I’ve always been about Paul,
my life and i will do what i want,
screw those that don’t like it.
yes, it has cost me a lot of things,
but hey, i love myself so much, i don’t care.
It’s always interesting to hear this. This is such a foreign concept to me. I used to always put everyone else ahead of myself. Not wanting to esteem myself more highly than I ought I esteemed myself not at all. I’ve learned that’s no good and am trying to figure out how to live in the middle somewhere.
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RUTH, I’M A LIBRA, TRYING TO STAY BALANCED MAKES MY WILDY IMBALANCED, LOL.
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RUTH, I’M A LIBRA,
Any particular reason you yelled this at me? lol
I’ve never been much into astrology and signs, but I’m supposed to be a lion, for crying out loud! I am Ruth, hear me ROAR! Ha!
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oooppppss, strange, my comment posted before I even finished my point.
Ruth, my self esteem was in the gutter when I was a child,
I suffered a lot of mental and physical abuse at the hands of my xtian parents because I was such an unrepentant sissy. lol.
again, my opinion, but I think people need to love themselves and make themselves happy before even bothering to put anyone else first. it just isn’t going to work otherwise.
you will get to that place, the middle ground you seek, just remember, never make yourself feel less in order to make anyone else feel more.
LikeLike
When I was raising my son, I did not promote atheism, neither did I ever send him to church – the topic of religion simply never came up. My son ultimately married a staunch Catholic girl, with the deeply-held convictions rarely seen outside the Hispanic culture to which she belonged. He has gone from agnostic, when they were married (if the term can be applied to one who simply never thinks about religion, one way or another), to a full-blown atheist today. Sticking with his Dad through three marriages, he early on decided that divorced was not something he ever wanted to be, and so he has never mentioned his beliefs – or lack of them – to his wife, or, for that matter, his son. He goes to church every week, participates in church activities, does the kneeling and the crossing and the wafer and the wine – the whole nine yards – in essence, he is living a double life, sans cape and tights.
A few weeks ago, when he was driving his son home from basketball practice, the boy asked, “Remember how you told me that when I grew up I could choose which religion I wanted to be? I think I want to be an atheist.”
I swear on a stack of Origin of Species that I had nothing to do with it! I just hope his Mom’s heart is strong enough to take the surprise she’s going to be in for in a few years! And that I can handle the blame that will ultimately be heaped on me, despite my innocence.
LikeLike
the all caps was an accident. I’m wasn’t yelling, just not paying enough attention to what i’m doing this morning. my brain is all over the place today.
my apologies.
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my parents would spank me violently with a belt if I even questioned anything in the bible.
eventually I started hitting back, that put a stop to it pretty darn quick.
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the all caps was an accident. I’m wasn’t yelling,
I was being a smartass. It’s part of my charm, right arch?
you will get to that place, the middle ground you seek, just remember, never make yourself feel less in order to make anyone else feel more.
Been there, done that, got alotta t-shirts. Never again. That is one thing that I have learned.
my parents would spank me violently with a belt if I even questioned anything in the bible.
Gahhhhh! I’m so sorry, Paul.
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Well, if you DO run across her, I hope you’ll let us know – I’d love to crash her party.
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I was being a smartass. It’s part of my charm, right arch?
there seems to be a plethora of charming smart asses here.
GOOD!
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Careful, Paul – you’re starting to show a softer side of yourself, and if that happens, there’s no going back – “in-your-face” is not likely to work on this blog, ever again.
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“I used to always put everyone else ahead of myself. Not wanting to esteem myself more highly than I ought, I esteemed myself not at all. I’ve learned that’s no good and am trying to figure out how to live in the middle somewhere.”
That’s a very profound thought, Ruth.
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“I’M A LIBRA, TRYING TO STAY BALANCED MAKES MY WILDY IMBALANCED, LOL.”
Well, your “WILDY” certainly seems rather imbalanced at the moment, but I’m pretty sure they make pills for that —
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well, someone, I forgot who, asked about the gay male brain.
the male side of me is a lazy, slacker,, would prefer to get high and play video games and not argue with anyone. totally beta
the female side, on the other hand, I’m a mean girl,
completely alpha.
soooooooooo weird.
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“just remember, never make yourself feel less in order to make anyone else feel more.”
Not arguing that for a second, it’s very sound advice, but sometimes it doesn’t hurt to make yourself SEEM less, in order to make someone else feel more.
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but sometimes it doesn’t hurt to make yourself SEEM less, in order to make someone else feel more.
sounds pandering and dishonest to me, but, hey, whateva, I guess.
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“eventually I started hitting back, that put a stop to it pretty darn quick.”
Our approaches are certainly different, I’ll say that – the last time that ever happened to me, I folded my arms and said, “When you’re finished, let me know.” It soon ended, and never happened again.
LikeLike
“It’s part of my charm, right arch?”
Yeah, you do have a certain charm, but it’s not easy to spot until you’ve dropped the façade. When the women start going, “Gahhhhh! I’m so sorry, Paul,” you’ve probably hit a good balance.
LikeLike
I come from a very terrible cult environment. I spend my time attempting to reveal the truth to people who might be saved from entering said cult(s) by proving (using science) that the cult is absolutely wrong (in every way). It split into over 700 sects (all teaching about the same thing), some of the leaders are actually in prison for felonies, but people still hang on every rubbish word they say and give them money; liars, felons and wouldn’t you know, some of them have been so abused they have committed suicide. In fact, one of the sect of the cult is regularly exposed on Dr. Phil, but people never wake up.
Can you imagine a church preacher telling you to leave your disabled child in a shopping mall because someone will find it and take care of it? You don’t have to. It’s already been done in the cult. You think that pedophiles are terrible among a certain religion’s priests? Look no further than this little collection of cults with stalkers, pedophiles, narcissists, sociopaths, psychopaths, cons and nutjobs. The DSM-5 isn’t comprehensive enough to cover it all. And don’t forget the coverups.
While I still believe in God, it’s really tough to believe the Bible, since the New Testament seems to have been written by the Roman Catholic Church from crazy traditions spread by word of mouth by the illiterate superstitious and many of the books seem to have been forged. It’s hardly comforting to look to for inspiration.
So I’ve divorced myself from the group (since they don’t seem to have the guts to disfellowship or ban me outright) to preserve some little shred of sanity, instead of sitting there listening to provable outright outrageous lies. But the thing is, what do you do with a spouse who is sliding into dementia, hanging on every word of her “pastor” who committed adultery on his wife as she was dying of cancer?
If you want to understand discrimination — real discrimination — try growing up as a baptized Lutheran attending a Roman Catholic Parochial School from the age of 5 and continuing for 11 years: Watching the RCCs bowing down before graven images. I won’t call it idolatry. It simply physically defies the Second Commandment (which the Catholics excised from their version of Exodus and Deuteronomy).
Truth.
It is an outdated irrelevant concept.
At least in this alternative universe.
Fortunately, my cat is sane (as being the only sane person I know at the moment). It helps keep me centered. And he has his own website (three blogs — because he can!) over at blackopsmikey.com although he’s not doing much right now beyond sleeping. Purr and fur can be so comforting if you’re not allergic (I’m certain to receive persecution because I happen to have a cat too). By the way: He doesn’t like string — he plays with a rope: He’s one big kitty.
LikeLike
“sounds pandering and dishonest to me, but, hey, whateva, I guess.”
Clearly, your parents didn’t go out of their way to enhance your self esteem – the little boy in you was so brow-beaten he was broken, hence the strong girl emerged to protect him. You, of all people, should be aware of the value of protecting another’s self-esteem. Have you never allowed a child to beat you at a game you know you could easily have won? You may not be a “kid person” at all, but if you are, I’ll bet you have.
LikeLike
“But the thing is, what do you do with a spouse who is sliding into dementia, hanging on every word of her ‘pastor’ who committed adultery on his wife as she was dying of cancer?”
I’ve no doubt that NeuroNotes would have something to say on that topic, but she’s busy today with other things.
“my cat is sane…although he’s not doing much right now beyond sleeping.”
Try flipping on the vacuum cleaner – I have it on the good authority of John Zande that that will wake him up. Just make sure that, unlike John, you aren’t holding him at the time —
LikeLike
I picked this up off of Mak’s site, Random Thoughts, and felt it worth sharing:
Yeah, you do have a certain charm, but it’s not easy to spot until you’ve dropped the façade.
Whatchu talkin’ ’bout Willis? Facade? Me?
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